When Bristol Palin announced that her Dancing with the Stars outfits would be modest, it seemed inevitable: they should be made by nuns. And why not go right to the top?
The Spoof can now confirm that it is the nuns at the Vatican -- the ones who fashion the Pope's attire -- who have been chosen for the all-important task of clothing Bristol for the show. They will be using materials left over from the making of the Pope's wardrobe.
The specific details are top secret, but suffice it to say that the fabrics will range from textured brocades (think vestments) to non-see-through white linen. Head gear will be a white beanie with sequins or unique creations fashioned after what the good sisters wear (wimple, bonnet, or whatever). For the feet? What else but pointy-toed red slippers.
Are the Pope's wardrobe needs on the back burner for the moment as the good nuns of the Vatican concentrate on Bristol's DWTS wardrobe? You Betcha!
A grumpy Pontiff is said to be seething at the lack of attention to HIS attire. "I'm saying a Novena that Bristol's the first one kicked off the show," the Pontiff said. "Then the nuns can get back to doing what they're supposed to be doing. Taking care of ME and my clothes. Amen."
Gail Farrelly is the author of three mystery novels. The latest is "Creamed at Commencement: A Graduation Mystery." One of her short stories is published online: "Get Yourself a Face" (about a Mafia princess who buys herself a face transplant and a lot of trouble). Her story "Even Steven" was a finalist in the 2007 Derringer Award competition.
Gail Farrelly is the author of three mystery novels. The latest is "Creamed at Commencement: A Graduation Mystery." One of her short stories is published online: "Get Yourself a Face" (about a Mafia princess who buys herself a face transplant and a lot of trouble). Her story "Even Steven" was a finalist in the 2007 Derringer Award competition.